It has been so long since my last blog. It has been my goal for the last month or more but just seemed to be slipping down on my “to do” list. The more I listen to conversations in classes and during trainings the more I think about the need to write an entry. There have been a lot of feelings and emotions going on at A & B. There have been some big life changing events for some of us, some have experienced losses, babies have been born, we have celebrated engagements, and much much more. It has been amazing to witness how we have all become not only classmates but also friends and family who we share good time and bad times with.
My life is perfect?
The other day someone told me how perfect my life is. I couldn’t help but to smile thinking of the last two years. There are all kinds of emotions that I feel when I look back. Two years ago I left my full time job to spend more time with my daughter. I went back to teaching group classes and working one on one training individuals, same thing I did right out of college. I wanted to make a difference in others’ lives again. I wanted to help guide and motivate others to feel better about themselves. And honestly I left my full time job to work part-time and teach here and there casually. I’m sure others saw it before I even did, that “casual” and “part-time” is not in my genetic makeup. Zero or 100 mph is what I seemed to go. Only slowing down to sleep my 4.5 to 5.5 hours a night.
In the last two years I have been on top of the world, and I have also felt like a failure. I have poured my heart into work and relationships that some still remain and others don’t exist. My zero to 100 mph theory was starting to fail me. I was starting to lose focus on what truly were the most important things in life. Not slowing down was starting to have a negative effect on my body, my mentality, and my relationships. I wanted to help more and more people and was so thankful to see A & B grow for both Amber and I that I let myself come last and not take the time to nurture the friendships and relationships I needed. The opposite of what I was preaching to my clients. It took some eye opening experiences and strength and love from amazing people to really open my eyes to what I need to find happiness.
I’m not so sure that sounds “perfect” but I learned that the worst times of my life are followed by some of my best times. That things do happen for a reason. That there are things worth fighting for, you just need to open your heart to change.
Are there things I would change in my life over the last couple of years? Maybe one or two if I could go back in time, but either way I doubt I would be the same person today if all those previous events or relationships didn’t exist.
I may be as stubborn and full of fire as ever but I am coming to terms with the fact that I can’t be everything to everyone. I am human and make mistakes. I will always do my best at what I do. I will be grateful, thankful, I will fight for what I want and let go of things that are not what I thought they were. No my life is not perfect and neither am I. But I am happier then I have ever been. I am excited for the future and can’t wait to see what lies ahead.
I’ve learned more than ever what work you put into something you get out. That things don’t happen by just waiting for someone else to make the move for you.
I am thankful for those who have wanted more, who have shown support, and has helped create A&B to what it is today as we open our second location this week in Sun Prairie. Grateful to our husbands who have poured countless hours of work into each studio and have believed in both of us. Amber and I seem to talk alike (although one of us is louder than the other ), dress alike, and think alike so I know Amber feels the same way when I say our hearts are overflowing with the love we have been given and the love we feel for all who support us.
Here’s to a wonderful summer. One that we all need to slow down and enjoy with friends and family. We need to give ourselves a little mental break and take the pressure off of being “perfect”.
“Sometimes you just need a break. In a beautiful place. To figure everything out. To believe that something wonderful is about to happen.”